Using sex toys and experimenting with each other's pleasure levels is fun and exciting, but many people have certain hang ups about bringing this up with their partner and are afraid of how they will react. In fact, many couples use sex toys in the bedroom and for them it is a totally normal thing to do within the privacy of their own home. They are happy doing this and enjoy it immensely.

Perhaps you are a woman and you are worried about your man thinking that what he does now in bed is not good enough. Couples start using sex toys for all kinds of reasons and it is not likely your man will be offended, chances are he will be overjoyed that you want to spice things up. Men are sometimes nervous about introducing sex toys into the bedroom because he might worry that you might take offence or not be comfortable with spicing it up. Whatever the reason, it is highly likely that your partner, male or female will be happy to join you in trying something new like a vibrator.

Most couples want to please each other and many people engage in sexual activity that includes sex toys. If you are feeling unsure about raising this issue, then follow your instincts and take this slowly. Some ideas on how you can talk to your partner about this might be just what you need. It is usually people who have been raised to see sex as dirty who feel weird about this, but in recent years most people are quite liberal when it comes to experimenting with sex toys. So, how do you bring it up in a way that will not offend your partner? You could try the following ideas below:

1. Be Direct About What You Want

Just tell your partner how you feel and go from there. Tell them you would like to experiment and bring a little extra variety into the bedroom in the form of sex toys. Reinforce the fact that you love your partner and love making love with them, but you would like to experiment a little. If you have used sex toys in the past and your partner has not, then tell them a little about your experience without going into too much detail, you don't need your lover to get jealous over the previous lover who you did this with.

Don't make the mistake of holding back your feelings, especially if you really want to try this. Tell your partner you are curious and you also feel that introducing sex toys into your sex life would be beneficial to both of your libidos and the health of the relationship. Let your partner know that you wish for the two of you to maintain the close relationship you have and that you have read about sex toys and how they can help with this.

2. Ask Your Partner To Go Shopping With You

If it seems like your partner is up for it, then why not plan a shopping trip or surf the Internet to see what is out there. If he or she is not keen to go shopping, then tell your partner that you are going to go and see what is out there. How they react to this is going to be the deciding factor in whether you move forward or give them more time. You could even buy your partner a vibrator and wait it out to see if he or she suggests you fool around with it or perhaps put it away for Christmas or your Anniversary if you feel they are not ready yet. It is pretty unlikely that your partner will be offended by something you have bought for them that will give them sexual pleasure, but it does happen so be cautious if your partner is apprehensive.

If your partner is shy about sex, then you might have to be very patient. If you love each other and your relationship is healthy, then it is likely that he or she will come around and want to participate in spicing things up. Some people forget that sex is about pleasure and some people are not comfortable voicing what they want in the bedroom. Tell your partner that you feel that sex toys will help the two of you to communicate about sex without feeling so uncomfortable.

3. Start Small

If you and your partner are both on board with trying out sex toys, then feel free to go shopping and see what is out there. It is advised that you start out with something simple like a ring vibrator for him or a small vibrator for her. Don't go all out and buy all sorts of sex toys and novelties, because you might overwhelm you partner if they are a little uncomfortable with this. So take things slow and steady and eventually you will both be looking at wanting to try other sex novelties and toys.

If you partner is nervous or not very comfortable expressing themselves you will have to go at their pace. Once you get started and have a few lovely experiences of really wonderful sex, it won't take long before your partner starts getting curious, especially if the experience is positive and you are both having fun. That's the goal, to have fun and be pleasured and add to your sex life and enhance your relationship.

4. Be Generous, Loving And Give Feedback

Try to focus on giving your partner pleasure for the purpose of finding out what they like and do not like. This is important because you will learn so much more about your partner's sexual preferences and what he or she likes. Giving your partner pleasure is often so much better than receiving pleasure yourself. However, take turns in stimulating each other and make sure you ask your partner what they like and what feels good. It is this kind of exchange in the bedroom that makes it easier for you and your partner to talk about sex. Sex toys are really great for this.

Perhaps you have an amazing sex life already and if you do that's great, but by being more loving and generous with affection and giving your partner pleasure will build appreciation and a stronger bond between you. Giving and seeking feedback is what will bring the two of you close and more able to communicate about sex in new ways. You will also find that communication in general is better between the two of you.

5. Choose Your Sex Toys Together

You might want mull over the possibility of shopping together whenever you are thinking about purchasing a new sex toy. It is respectful to choose these personal items together. Perhaps it might be worth suggesting this rather than going out and buying your partner a vibrator. If you have sex toys from a previous relationship, it is probably wise to purchase new toys that are strictly yours and your partner's toys. Some people would consider it not very cool to use a sex toy that you used with your ex. In fact your partner may get quite upset by this.

Make a day to go shopping if the two of you have decided that this is something you would like to experiment with and want to see what is out there. If you go shopping together and both agree on a sex toy together, this takes away the possibility of your partner being upset that they were not included in the decision.

6. Consider The Status of Your Relationship

Another tip that might serve you is to wait until you know where you are headed in the relationship before opening the sex toy issue, but then again, plenty of men and women who have casual affairs will often express an interest in using sex toys, so you never can tell. People are different in how they think and feel and their sexual appetites are often different too. So it is a good idea to get to know what your partner likes and dislikes, simply for the purpose of building closeness in the bedroom and in your relationship or marriage.

If your relationship is in the early stages and you have not really had any kind of conversation about where the future will take you, it is probably wise to wait for awhile. If it is clear to both of you that you are engaging in a casual affair together and it is not going to be serious, then there is probably no harm in talking to your lover about spicing things up a little for the sake of intensifying both of your sexual experiences. Having said this, the article's focus is about relationships and people who are serious about their love for each other and if you would like to spice up your sex life, then your timing on when to raise the issue of sex toys is probably something you should definitely be giving a lot of thought to.

Ask yourself if your relationship is stable and secure? Do you have work to do in terms of solving problems that have come up since you have been seeing your partner. The best time to introduce more spice in the form of sex aids is when your relationship is on solid ground. If there are problems in the bedroom, then doing something different like using a few sex toys might be just what the doctor ordered, plenty of couples are using sex toys to encourage more sexual activity in the relationship.

Take The Next Step

In wrapping up what has been said here, the point should be made that it is a really different world now compared to fifty or sixty years ago. It really does not matter if you are in your late teens or heading towards retirement. You would be surprised at just how many older couples feel about sex toys. Your age is just a number, it is how you feel and what you want from your life and your relationship or marriage that really counts.

It is always wise to err on the side of caution and be careful how you handle telling your partner of your wishes, especially if your partner is likely to be a little nervous or hesitant. Pick a time when you are both relaxed and in a good mood, because the chances are that your partner will really hear what you have to say and want to do all they can to give you what you are asking for. When you love someone, it is usually second nature to make their happiness your top priority and if your partner loves you then he or she will put your happiness at the top of their priorities too.

The partner who introduces sex toys into the relationship is usually the one who gets the ball rolling, however your partner might surprise you and request to try this new experience out of the blue. This happens more than you think. A partner who is a little apprehensive about sex toys, might just need some time to think about it, he or she might even talk to a close friend or research this on the Internet. You may be in a position where you are going to have guide your partner a little, especially if this is new to them. It might be new to both of you, which will open the door for both of you to learn more about your sexuality and your partner's.

You now have a quite a few ideas on how to go about introducing your relationship to a more satisfying and exciting experience in the bedroom. Hopefully you have gained some valuable information about how sex toys can benefit the both of you and most importantly what steps or ideas you might want to consider when thinking about talking to your partner about this. You know your partner best, so use your instincts and when you are ready, taking into account the advice above you can bring this up with your partner.